Immy Chua

Just Being and Let things Happen….


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Father and Daughter

father and daughterToday is my last day in Malaysia after spending 5 weeks away from my comfort zone downunder. I am looking forward to go back but my heart still here….My Home! I am coming back again in October…..yes another 7 months and I am home again…this time I will be fit and healthy and will catch up with all my friends who I missed this trip!

My father sent me an email the last day I was in Bombay asking me to stay back so mom and dad could look after me as he felt my pain and wanted to share my pain….it was a sweet and short email before he left for China for 3 weeks ‘backpacking’ ! Yes, he is 72 this year and enjoys travelling ‘in style’. He flew to Yunnan, come back via Cambodia and Thailand via train, bus…etc. Awesome!

My high school friends recently told me that a daughter was her father’s lover in his past life. If a woman can’t get together with the man she loves, she’ll be reincarnated to be his daughter in the next life. If a female spirit falls in love with a man, she’ll be reincarnated into his wife’s abdomen to be his daughter. I don’t know if it is true, I don’t  have a special bond with my father, everyone is the family ‘afraid’ of him. He is the ‘King’ of the house, we just have to follow his instruction. He is right all the time, even if he is wrong, he will not admit! He has a huge Ego! Sound like your dad?

The first day I arrived in Kuala Lumpur, I have a long chat with my aunty (my father’s sister) about my father. She told me when she was young, all the brothers and sisters afraid of my father, because he was the one who made decision at home. my grandpa died when they were young, leaving my grandma and 10 children. Dad is number forth but he took over as the eldest son’s responsibility in managing the family business. Then, I told my aunty…..”actually….I am very much like my dad, huge ego, stubborn, always want to be right, tough, love challenging…..I could actually see myself in him!’ My aunty was laughing and said to me…when I was about 2 years old, I was already a very stubborn child, once I made up my mind….no one could convince me!  She said I would cry at the top of the staircase (as we were living in a double storey shop house) refused to be helped to come down and then later they would hear something rolling down the stairs which was me from the top to the bottom and I was fine because I refused to be held by them to come down the stairs! Exactly like my dad…rather bleed then tears! Why would such a child has this type of character? When was this stubborn seed been planted? Previous life? Why I ‘inherited’ all these characters from my dad and yet I couldn’t bond with him?

I never feel his love so deeply until cancer strike me! Yes, cancer brought me home to my dad and also my mom. My parents dropped everything just to look after me when I was sick. Same as what they did for my late brother and they had to do this again, just imagined how they felt! Every early morning, my mom would wash and cut all the carrots and apples, then my dad would prepare all the juice for me, fresh and nice in the fridge . Prepared my breakfast then drove me to the clinic for treatment, then they both went to  fresh market shopping for my ‘medicine’. They would then pick me up after my treatment, mom would cook and they respected me and let me ate my meal before cooking theirs as my meal was tasteless, no oil, no salt, no sugar, no seasoning…just fresh veggie. They just dropped everything and did this for me everyday for 3 months. The greatest love on earth! Who am I to doubt my father’s love to me! and my mom!

After 3 months, when I was leaving for Melbourne, my dad cried…my cousin told me, he cried! And now after 2 years….I could feel his love to me before he left for China….I could feel his love so deeply…..I think we both changed..we both became emotional….and the love between us was so strong yet so distance as we both still very stubborn of showing our love!….so it makes me wonder……was my father my lover in my previous life? What about you? What relationship you have with your father? or What relationship you have with your daughter? Would love to hear from you!


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Incredible Chaotic Bombay

Today is my last day in Bombay…..I don’t dislike India but I haven’t yet fell in with India. Maybe one day I would!

It is incredible to see how the people here cope with their daily life in such a populated, congested, polluted, chaotic, hard…..environment and yet they are still coping extremely well and happy….they just accept and be okay with it! Traffic is congested, nobody follow the traffic rules, cars run over the pedestrian crossing, road condition is bad. Homeless people everywhere, they sleep on the street, no one care. Young mothers with kids every where beg for money, milk powder. Dogs and cows are everywhere on the street looking for food. Why ? Because Bombay is The Dream city, people come here to find their dream!

I love my home, Malaysia because all the people I love are there. But when I am home, I miss Melbourne, I miss my comfy, quite, clean, neat second home! I have been given myself lots of excuses that I couldn’t do this and that due to the heat, the noise back home in Malaysia. Bombay shows me it is possible to do everything and anything in a chaotic environment! How….just be patient and be okay with whatever happens…..nothing work smoothly in Bombay and they are preferably ok with it! Amazing! They don’t get mad, they don’t get aggressive. They are just Okay!

I am going to do the same with my pain, just be okay and be happy…..just like Bombay! The Incredible Chaotic Bombay!

It is amazing….free and peaceful….! You might consider trying!

See you again Bombay! I might fall in love with you next time!


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A Letter to Pain

Dear Pain,

You came to my life since Jan and I am so pleased to get to know you. You taught me how to welcome, to embrace and to make peace with you since I arrived here in Mumbai.

I will continue welcoming you in my life, embracing and making peace with you. I have faith in you that everything is going to be ok! I hope you have a great stay with me and leave when I arrive in Melbourne. I believe I have had my share of you for the last 4 to 5 weeks. Please leave me at night let me have a good deep rest. Please leave me during the day so I can be like a normal me, going to work, shopping, going out with friends and just be me, happy, healthy and physically fit to enjoy doing everything. Please make peace with me, please, please, please……..I know you can and you will.

I am leaving you don’t mean I don’t love you. You came to my life taught me how to welcome, embrace and make peace with you! One of the best thing happen in my life and I will apply this whatever I encounter in the future…..Welcome, Embrace and Make Peace! Good, bad, joy, sad, fear…..anything and everything…..

Thanks and wish you have a great journey back home !

Love,
Im