Immy Chua

Just Being and Let things Happen….

母愛 Mother’s Love

9 Comments

I was brought up in the environment that when I grew up I had to look after my brothers and my brothers had to look after our youngest brother. I unconsciously accepted the responsibilities to take care of my family, not just me, my brothers as well. My mom didn’t have the opportunity to study, she only finished her primary education, but she insisted us to go to university so as my dad and my grandma. They believe knowledge is our best intangible asset, no one could ever steal it away from us. My mom had her way in invested in some properties with the help of her dad and kept all her money for our education.

I was lucky having the opportunity to study abroad even I had to work very hard to sponsor myself. Working part time in the restaurant and full time during holiday. It was tough but rewarding. After I graduated, I went to China to work and sponsored my brother. During that time, my relationship with my mom was ‘tense’, we had nothing to talk about except money, she rang me when my brother needed to pay his uni fees. I remembered there was once she rang and I burst in tears and told her why every time you rang me just asked me for money…..she cried and said she didn’t know what to talk to me! I viewed myself as a victim not knowing I was the one who distance her, rang away from her love! That was how I ended in Australia! I never try to feel her love and never given her a chance to show her love to me because I never take the initiative to spend time with her and I accused her of not loving me!

I distance myself with her for almost 20 years…..cancer gave me the opportunity to reunite with my mom. I spent the past 4 weeks with her, every single moment. Her love is unconditional, caring and extremely patient. The way she taking care of my nephews remind me how I was taken care by her when I was young. She cooks, teaches, feeds and even plays with them. My nephew loves dragon dance, loves playing the drum. The little one was playing the drum and instructed her to act the dragon using the towel as the dragon head, it was so sweet! I wasn’t feeling well due to my extreme Qi reaction, she was very worried and I could feel her feeling my pain. The past 4 weeks was the best time happened in my life even I was under extremely pain due to the Qi reaction.

Please don’t love your mom from a distance like me! Phone calls, emails, Skye just the ‘feel good tools’.Just ‘being’ with her and feel her.

不要愛得太远、多点回家看看! (Please don’t love from a distance, go home more often)

p/s I started writing this in the train on the way to the airport leaving for Mumbai, I was in tears and I stopped as I felt embarrassed. When I arrived in Mumbai, I told my dear friend I became very emotional while writing in public and felt embarrassed. He was very happy and told me it is very good to get emotional……let it out and don’t feel embarrassed. I am now in Mumbai Starbucks and continued with this post with tears in public…..it feels so so good!

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Author: Immy Chua

A day after I turned 42, I was diagnosed with Stage 2 Grade 4 bladder cancer….what a surprise birthday gift! 16 years ago on my birthday, my late brother was diagnosed with leukemia. He passed away after 6 months of chemotherapy. My doctors told me they were unable to cure me….as my cancer is an aggressive type. The statistic with chemotherapy treatment is 45% in 5 years. I refused chemotherapy because of my brother. So, I asked if I don’t do anything, what would happen? My doctor told me….if I don’t do anything, after 3 months, my cancer will spread to every parts of my body. I told my doctor, 3 months, I still have plenty of time to find a solution. So..I rejected the death sentence and went searching for solution……..My cancer journey start ….. This blog is about my exciting cancer journey which helps me to discover and reassess my life, my relationship with my family, my so-called career goal, my diet, my view, my belief…..everything…..for the past 2 years… I wish it will help everyone to look at illness as a blessing and opportunity to heal rather than seeing yourself as a victim.

9 thoughts on “母愛 Mother’s Love

  1. Yes you only get one mom… and to touch her as she will touch you will only give you something you will never be without! 🙂 Good to see you back my friend. Missed you! 🙂

  2. What is Qi reaction?

    • Qi reaction can come in any form, physically and emotionally. I have extreme pain from abdomen to my left leg and I get very emotional. There are parts of the healing reaction of Qi Qong.

  3. 感谢老天让你有机会领悟及感恩。

  4. Thank you for finding and following my blog. I am so touched by your story. So inspired. It is very brave what you are doing. When I had my lumpectomy, I refused to do chemo or radiation or tamoxifin. Six months later and two weeks after my 50th birthday I found another lump. I had a mastectomy and just finished chemo. It felt right this time. Now I am wrestling with whether to do the tamoxifin or not. Trying to listen to my body and to my heart and find another solution.
    Thank you for sharing and NEVER be afraid of being emotional in public. It can help others heal from your willingness to be vulnerable. I have always said that crying is my super power. Cleansing with salt water. Take care of yourself and keep me posted. Blessings, Jodeen

    • Thanks Jodeen. I am so pleased you found me and I wish you all the best. I will be back to Melbourne, Australia next week and will follow your blog. I believe we can share and help each other. Initially this blog is about sharing my dietary healing and it becomes spiritual….when I started looking inside my ‘heart’ started listening. You are right, get emotional is a good thing, don’t hold on…..let go….this is the most precious thing I learnt here in Mumbai, India…I am so blessed!
      I started energy healing recently and I am overwhelmed with the reaction both physically and emotionally. If you are interested, please visit the post call Vitamin Qi.

  5. 惟有用心沟通,设身处地,站在母亲的立场,才能真正理解母亲的心!

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